Easter Egg Mission
by Samurai Smee
Summary: Oneshot. It is Easter at the Vatican, and Tres does not understand the rules of the classic Easter Egg Hunt. HA! Enjoy!


Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Easter Egg Mission

"This is not an adequate use of time," Tres said dully as he stood in line among the other AX members in the Vatican gardens.

Each had in his or her hand a brightly colored basket that was filled half way with some kind of stringy, green plastic stuff that seemed to be getting everywhere.

"Oh, come on, Tres. This is going to be fun!" Abel beamed from two people down on his left.

"Negative," Tres replied emotionlessly.

It was Easter Sunday at the Vatican and Caterina had insisted that all of her AX agents participate in a good ol' fashioned Easter egg hunt before Mass. Tres sighed and looked down at his empty, yellow basket as he remembered her words: _"It's to lighten up everyone's moods. Everyone deserves to enjoy a little fun once in a while."_

Tres's eyes went to Sister's Esther's basket that was next to his.

Green.

He wanted that one.

Suddenly, Caterina and Father Havel appeared before them all with big smiles on their faces.

"Good morning and Happy Easter everyone!" Caterina said cheerfully, appreciating the good turn out for her event.

"As you know," she continued, "we have 50 eggs hidden all over the garden area for you all to find. There will be no teams, so the person with the most eggs at the end wins a prize!"

Two people down, Tres saw that Abel was jumping up and down in excitement while Esther just rolled her eyes at him.

"Go!!" Caterina finally shouted.

At her command, everyone in the line took off in all directions...everyone but Tres. Deciding to approach the mission strategically, Tres began scanning the surrounding area with his glowing red eyes for the locations of the eggs. After locating several "targets," Tres took off to their precise spots.

One in a bush.

One on a tree limb.

One in the bird bath.

As Tres approached his next target in a flower bed, he noticed Father Leon was already there, picking up the pink-colored egg.

"Father Leon," Tres said to the bent-over man.

"Oh Tres! Look, a 'Dandelion' in a flower bed. HA!" Leon exclaimed merrily as he began to laugh at his own joke.

But to Leon's ultimate horror and shock, Tres suddenly had one of his Jericho M13s pointed right in his face. Leon's laughter died in his throat as he squeaked, "Wh-what..."

"Relinquish you control over the egg immediately," Tres commanded, not lowering his gun from Leon at all.

Shaking and mouth open, Leon slowly extended his hand with the little, pink egg and dropped it in Tres' basket. Satisfied, Tres holstered his large gun, turned on his heel, and raced after his next location; leaving Leon still with his hand out in shock.

On his way to retrieve the next "target," Tres spotted Father Hugue with several eggs in his blue basket. Tres eyed the basket and its contents. He would have preferred blue as well to his yellow basket.

Nonetheless, Tres walked up to Hugue, who was busy looking around for an obvious egg. Thinking quickly, Tres widened his eyes, pointed up towards a treetop and exclaimed (to the best of his abilities), "Father Hugue, look out!" Instinctively, Hugue dropped his basket and ducked out of the way, trying to avoid whatever it was that was after him. As soon as Hugue had covered his head with his arms, Tres calmly bent down and took a handful of Hugue's eggs and put them in his own basket, then quickly walked away.

Tres noticed that his basket was getting quite full and he half-grinned at his superior progress.

"30 seconds left!" Caterina shouted from the sidelines.

"30 seconds. Executing Plan C – immediate quantity maximization," Tres stated aloud to himself.

Just then, Tres noticed Sister Esther standing by a rose bush, peering into the thorny shrub.

Perfect.

Tres changed his stride as he approached her; walking slowly, carefully. Luckily, Esther turned around in time to notice his slow stride towards her, making her blush as she also noticed his half-lidded eyes looking right into hers. Her heart jumped up in her throat as he finally stopped right in front of her, looking lustfully down at her.

"Um, Tres..." she managed to choke out, but it was too late.

Tres lightly touched her cheek as he tilted his head down and kissed her fully on the lips. His eyes closed as hers widened as he deepened their kiss and held her chin. Shock still present, but also melting by his surprisingly delightful kiss, Esther's eyes slipped shut as well.

As soon as she had her eyes closed, Tres' free hand immediately began transferring all of her eggs to his basket. One more...and done. Tres, now finished with his trick, slowly pulled his lips from Esther's, opened his eyes, and promptly left. Esther was blushing profusely with a drunken look on her face, not even noticing that she had just been robbed blind. Tres smiled as he walked away from the stunned girl with his now heavy basket.

As soon as 'time' was called, everyone filed back into a line. Little did Tres know that he was receiving some very pissed looks from a few other fellow AX members in the line, as he maintained his straight-forward gaze. Tres did move his eyes to Caterina, though, as she walked from person to person; counting their eggs. Havel was trailing after her, writing down everyone's name and total eggs collected.

Finally, Caterina came up to Tres.

"Do you already know how many eggs you have, Tres?" Caterina asked, eyeing his vastly large quantity as opposed to everyone else's.

"Affirmative. I have 37 eggs, milady," Tres reported loyally.

"I see," Caterina said while nodding her head, impressed but curious. "Well, if I'm not mistaken," she continued as she gave a Havel a quick glance, who nodded, "that means you win the contest, Tres."

Everyone else in the line whined a little, but quickly hushed up when Caterina gave them 'the look.'

"Here's the first part of your winnings," Caterina said happily as she handed his a milk chocolate bunny. Abel fainted when Tres took the delicious Easter treat.

Caterina smiled and said, "And as for the second part..."

"Today, we will be reading from the Book of John, verse 16:5, the Work of the Holy Spirit..." Tres recited before the many, many church go-ers for Easter Mass.

Caterina and the others were seated in the pews, smiling and content that it was Tres who had to head the day's service, as per his "prize" for winning the egg hunt. Caterina adjusted her monocle, folded her hands back in her lap, and let out a small chuckle to herself. She had to admit that she enjoyed playing a little trick on her little trickster – even if it was Easter. _"Everyone deserves to enjoy a little fun once in a while,"_ she recalled pleasantly to herself as she continued to watch her poor Tres go on with the lengthy holiday service.


End file.
